Wednesday, February 20, 2008

A friend's new business

Some Little Known Facts About Minnesota

MINNESOTA BECAME THE 32ND STATE ON MAY 11, 1858, AND WAS ORIGINALLY SETTLED BY A LOST TRIBE OF NORWEGIANS SEEKING REFUGE FROM THE SEARING HEAT OF WISCONSIN'S WINTERS.

THE STATE FLAG OF MINNESOTA CONSISTS OF A BLUE BACKGROUND UPON WHICH SITS A DESIGN BEST
DESCRIBED AS, "HOW A 7-YEAR- OLD CITY GIRL WOULD DRAW A PICTURE TITLED 'LIFE ON THE FARM''.

MINNESOTA GETS IT'S NAME FROM THE SIOUX INDIAN WORD 'MAH-NEE-SOO- TAH',
MEANING, "NO, REALLY... THEY EAT FISH SOAKED IN LYE!"

THE STATE SONG OF MINNESOTA IS 'SOMEDAY THE VIKINGS WILL... AW, NEVER MIND'.

THE MALL OF AMERICA IN BLOOMINGTON, MINNESOTA COVERS 9.5 MILLION SQUARE FEET AND HAS ENOUGH
SPACE TO HOLD 185,000 IDIOT TEENAGERS YAPPING AWAY ON CELL PHONES.

MADISON, MINNESOTA, IS KNOWN AS 'THE LUTEFISK CAPITAL OF THE WORLD'. ..... AVOID THIS CITY AT ALL COSTS.

'THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW' WAS SET IN MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA, AND WAS MARY'S FIRST REAL ACTING JOB SINCE LEAVING THE 'DICK VAN DYKE SHOW'. THE SHOW ABOUT A SINGLE WOMAN'S STRUGGLE TO FIND HAPPINESS
IN THE BIG CITY, WAS ORIGINALLY TITLED 'LIFE WITHOUT DICK,' BUT THAT WAS CHANGED FOR SOME REASON.

THE STATE MOTTO OF MINNESOTA IS, 'WHERE EVEN A MAN WHO WEARS A FEATHER BOA CAN BE GOVERNOR.'

DOWNTOWN MINNEAPOLIS HAS AN ENCLOSED SKYWAY SYSTEM COVERING 52 BLOCKS, ALLOWING PEOPLE TO LIVE, WORK, EAT, AND SLEEP WITHOUT EVER GOING OUTSIDE. THE ONLY DOWNSIDE TO THIS IS THAT A NORWEGIAN
OCCASIONALLY TURNS UP MISSING.

CARTOONIST CHARLES M. SHULTZ WAS BORN IN MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA, AND GREW UP IN ST. PAUL.
HE WAS THE ONLY ARTIST TO ACCURATELY DEPICT THE PERFECTLY CIRCULAR HEADS OF MINNESOTA NATIVES.

THE HORMEL COMPANY OF AUSTIN, MINNESOTA, PRODUCES 6 MILLION CANS OF SPAM A YEAR, EVEN THOUGH
NO ONE ACTUALLY EATS THAT CRAP.

WATER SKIS WERE INVENTED IN 1922 IN LAKE CITY, MINNESOTA, BY RALPH SAMUELSON. SADLY, HE DROWNED
SHORTLY AFTERWARDS, AS THE MOTORBOAT HADN'T BEEN INVENTED YET.

ST. PAUL, MINNESOTA WAS ORIGINALLY NAMED 'PIG'S EYE,' AFTER FRENCH CANADIAN WHISKEY TRADER PIERRE
'PIG'S EYE' PARRANT. ITS 'TWIN CITY', MINNEAPOLIS, WAS KNOWN AS 'PIG'S COLON'.

THE STAPLER WAS INVENTED IN SWINGLINE, MINNESOTA, BY A CHUBBY, MUMBLING MAN NAMED MILTON IN 1899.
THE CITY WAS MYSTERIOUSLY DESTROYED BY FIRE LATER THAT YEAR.

PELICAN RAPIDS IS HOME TO A 16-FOOT-TALL CONCRETE PELICAN, WHICH SUBSISTS ON A DIET OF 4-FOOT-LONG CONCRETE FISH.

IN 1973, OLIVIA, MINNESOTA, ERECTED A 25-FOOT TALL FIBERGLASS CORN COB TO CELEBRATE ITS RICH, AGRICULTURAL HERITAGE. THEN IN 1974, IT WAS EATEN BY A 50-FOOT STATUE OF BABE THE BLUE OX.
YES, MINNESOTA HAS A LOT OF PROBLEMS WITH STATUE CANNIBALISM.

MINNESOTA LICENSE PLATES ARE BLUE & WHITE AND CONTAIN THE PHRASE
'BLIZZARDS ON INDEPENDENCE DAY - YOU GET USED TO IT.'

FRANK C. MARS, FOUNDER OF THE MARS CANDY CO. WAS BORN IN NEWPORT, MINNESOTA. HIS 3 MUSKETEERS
CANDY BAR ORIGINALLY CONTAINED THREE BARS IN ONE WRAPPER, EACH FILLED WITH A DIFFERENT FLAVOR
NOUGAT - CHOCOLATE, SPAM, AND LUTEFISK.

THE FIRST FULLY AUTOMATIC POP-UP TOASTER WAS INVENTED IN MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA IN 1926.
MINNESOTA'S STRINGENT BREAD - CONTROL LAWS CURRENTLY ONLY ALLOW RESIDENTS TO OWN -- SEMI-
AUTOMATIC TOASTERS.

TONKA TRUCKS CONTINUE TO BE MANUFACTURED IN MINNETONKA, MINNESOTA, DESPITE THE THOUSANDS OF
GI JOE DOLLS KILLED BY THEM ANNUALLY IN ROLLOVER ACCIDENTS. NO AIRBAGS, NO SEAT BELTS.
THESE THINGS ARE DEATHTRAPS, I TELL YA!

AUTHOR LAURA INGALLS WILDER WAS RAISED AT WALNUT GROVE, MINNESOTA, AND WAS FAMOUS FOR WRITING
THE 'LITTLE HOUSE' SERIES OF BOOKS, AS WELL AS INVENTING THE 'SPAM DIET' - WHICH CONSISTS OF LOOKING
AT A PLATE OF SPAM UNTIL YOU LOSE YOUR APPETITE. MUCH LIKE THE 'LUTEFISK DIET'.

THE SNOWMOBILE WAS INVENTED IN ROSEAU, MINNESOTA SO AS TO ALLOW FAMILIES A MEANS OF ATTENDING INDEPENDENCE DAY PICNICS.

MINNESOTANS ARE ALMOST INDISTINGUISHABLE FROM WISCONSINITES.
THE ONLY WAY TO TELL THEM APART IS TO ASK IF THEY VOTED FOR MONDALE IN '84.

Words Matter: Michelle Obama

No, the above link will not send you to an article about Mrs. Obama’s recent comment about how proud she feels about America now that they are leaning toward electing her husband. Instead, the above link is about Bill O’Reilly’s comment about lynching her. Yes, he’s probably meaning this is a metaphorical sense, but talking about lynching the wife of a bi-racial presidential candidate, a black woman, is at minimum insensitive, at maximum unconscionable.