Monday, October 03, 2016

My Presidential endorsement with reference to 3 fictional characters (Part 2 of 3)

         I just want to clarify something. I am doing this 3-piece endorsement as a private citizen, not as Pastor of St. Stephen, or as a representative of the ELCA.
         You might remember back in 2014 an organization attempted to bribe me to endorse candidates from the pulpit. And again, this year, representatives from one of the two main political parties in Middlesex (it’s local folk so I don’t really want to get anyone in trouble) have encouraged me to cede my pulpit to local candidates, which I have not done… for all the same reasons I didn’t endorse people from the pulpit in 2014.
         So again, this endorsement is not my church’s position, it is mine alone. So, onward and upward.

Pedro for Hillary

         I am endorsing Hillary Clinton because of Pedro. Not because Pedro, and Latinos everywhere are less likely to be demonized under a Clinton administration than under a Trump administration, though that is potentially a thing.
         No, I’m endorsing Hillary because Donald is promising to “make our wildest dreams come true,” but won’t deliver. He’ll promise anything to anyone.

Trump promised me healthcare, but not really
         For example, I had such a hard time figuring out what Trump will do with healthcare, because he’d promised the socialists a socialist policy, the libertarians the complete erasure of government involvement in healthcare, and then he had his actual policy.
         On healthcare he promised to make all of our wildest dreams come true.

Trump is offering Memberberrys
         I mean, think about his campaign slogan itself “Make American Great Again.” A great dream, especially if you don’t think America is currently great, but you remember the good old days when everything was coming up roses. But the question is, how do you even do that? Short of inventing a time machine you can never go back, “You never step into the same river twice.” It’s like the “memberberrys” that become sour grape in South Park. You can’t go back and trying will be pretty horrible.
         But let’s look at a few more of Trump’s “Make America Great Again” promises.

He makes all kinds of promises, most pretty out there and unworkable
         His biggest campaign promise, the Wall, will not actual be a wall, despite him describing it growing in size and so on. And if he builds the wall he’ll have to capitulate to Democrats on all kinds of issues (hey, maybe that’s how I’ll keep my health coverage).
         He also promises that he has a secret plan to defeat ISIS, America is going to take away ISIS’s oil, General Patton is going to lead the Army again, we’re going to use nuclear weapons again, China will invade North Korea for us so they’ll give up their nuclear weapons, and our alliances across the globe are going to be changed into a protection racket.
         On top of that, we’re going to ban all Muslims, build the Wall, renegotiate ALL our trade deals, force American companies to work only in America, and everyone is going to say Merry Christmas instead of Happy Holidays!

It is a compelling vision and story
         I really do see some of the appeal of this dream. ISIS gets a good kick in the teeth, no more stalemate wars like Iraq and Afghanistan, money flows back to the US of A to fix our potholes and pay for our debt, gas is back down to under a dollar a gallon because we're taking it from Terrorists, people will receive good money for good work again. (Clearly I also recognize a land war in Asia, kneecapping NATO, nukes going off, citizens being denied entry into the country based on their religion, etc, would be nightmarish).
         I get why people are buying into this dream, they distrust elites.
         “Look,” they say, “during World War 2 a bunch of non-elite farm boys got together and defeated Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan, then came home and created the best job market ever known, so,” they could rightly ask, “why can’t these elite folk do a few simple tasks like defeat a pocket of religious radicals and revive the manufacturing sector?” Then they’d go on, “Well, if they aren’t doing these things, it must be that they’re corrupt, that they are benefiting from our suffering!”
         And along comes Trump, “You’re right, Crooked Hillary and Elitist Obama are getting rich at your expense! I myself have soaked in this corruption, but now I’ll do the relatively simple task of fixing everything. It’s actually really easy, I’ll have it done by next week.”
         I want to believe it myself. I want all my dreams to come true!

But having concrete policies made for the real world is important
         But I also recognize we live in the world as it is, not as we wish it to be. I believe Hillary Clinton’s plans for America will make America safer, more prosperous, more united, and more dominant on the world stage than would the empty slogan, “Make America Great Again.”
         So, because Hillary has policies and Trump has a slogan please give Hillary Clinton a second look.

Up next Cartman.


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