Tuesday, October 05, 2004

Brief rant

What do you do when you feel as if you have been slighted? What do you do when you have put years into something and you are still treated like an outsider?
I feel like this too often. Today at the college Dems meeting I was going to hang out with my fellow directors and this guy just steps in front of me and pretty much asks me why I’m still there after the meeting. I felt like saying, "Well, I don’t know who you are, but I’m Director of Events with the College Democrats and I was going to hang out and talk with the other Directors, now get off my ass." Another example, for the most part I am still an outsider at the church here in Eugene that I have attended for the last 2 years! I've taught these people's children about GOD, yet they have no bloody clue who I am.
I don’t know, I sometimes feel that throughout my whole life I have failed to foster relationships to the point that I am just an interesting face in the crowd, not someone that people would actually like to know on more than a forced to be around/work related level, and honestly that is kind of depressing.
I know this whole condition is brought on by, among other things, my own innate bookishness, but I still wish I had relationships nourished to the point that they could spring out with a certain amount of spontaneity.

No comments: