So there is this song that they play constantly over here, Tori Alamaze's Don't Cha it is an absolutely horrible song, makes women out to be little more than sex toys, and so on. The problem is it has a really catchy beat, so I've caught myself singing it to myself. So, to prove I'm still a religious studies dork I started to modify the lyrics while hoovering (British version of vaccuming) the rooms. I've decided to pull a Weird Al.
Rabbi Akiba's Don't Cha
Ha’adam Ish Isha are you ready? Lets debate Ha’adam (ooooh) I know you respect me (I know you respect me) I know you do (I know you do) That’s why whenever I come around the shellfish comes out (the shellfish comes out). I know you want to be kosher (I know you want to be kosher) Its easy to see (its easy to see) And in the back of your mind I know you should be reading the TaNaK night and day (Adam).
Don’t cha wish your Rabbi was shomer-shabat like me? Don’ cha wish your Rabbi was a midrash geek like me? Don’t cha? Don’t cha? Don’t cha wish your Rabbi followed the Law like me? Don’t cha wish your Rabbi could say "the L-RD is One" like me? Don’t cha
Don’t cha remember the 8th commandment is about stealing (about stealing) And Yom Kippur is the day to atone (day to atone). Cause if it ain’t the 10th of Tishri It just ain’t enough reason to go to Temple (to go to Temple)
What, you don’t care? What you don’t want to share in the service? Don’t cha wish your Rabbi was shomer-shabat like me? Don’t cha wish your Rabbi was a midrash geek like me? (like me) Don’t cha (don’t cha Ha’adam) Don’t cha Don’t cha wish your Rabbi was followed the Law like me? (Law) Don’t cha wish your Rabbi could say "the L-rd is One" like me? (the big One) Don’t cha Don’t cha.
I know scripture’s on your mind all the time. I’m your Rabbi. "the L-RD is One." There is a line around the Torah. I ain’t lying. Look at Moshe. He ain’t blind, that was Paul (that was Paul). I know impure thoughts are on your mind. I know you think a non-kosher deli would be a good time.
I’m your Rabbi. "the L-RD is One." Around the Torah there is a line. I ain’t lying. Look at Moshe. He ain’t blind! I know you love G-d (love G-d). So I understand (I understand). Reformed Judaism is the thing for you. Yet if your were Orthodox. Maybe next lifetime (maybe next lifetime) Possibly (possibly). Until then I’m not your Rabbi?
Don’t cha wish your Rabbi was Shomer-shabat like me? Don’t cha wish your Rabbi was a midrash geek like me? Don’t cha Don’t cha wish your Rabbi was into the Law like me? Don’t cha wish your Rabbi could say "the L-RD is One" like me? Don’t cha Don’t cha?
2 comments:
Chris, have you ever listened to Jewish reggae? It's great!
I'm a college friend of your fellow global missionites Becca Tumm and Katie Blobaum. I almost lost it reading your lyric entry...I have become more than familiar with current pop lyrics through my work with high school students at my Lutheran Volunteer Corps placement. I don't know if D4L's "Laffy Taffy" has made its way across the pond yet, but let me just say I hear ya.
Thanks for sharing,
Anna Osterbur
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